Comments on 'Humans and Berries'

Please note: These comments are the personal opinons of members, and do not represent any sort of official judgement, even if they are made by people in club management.  Everyone deserves respect for their creativity; but if you find a negative comment on one of your works, please don't take it personally.  On the other hand, genuine personal attacks are not tolerated and any comment containing them will be deleted as soon as we discover it!

Submitted ByComment
Lyn Cavalier
New! Entered: 2015-06-18
Such a precious story, and good to see the backbone in both of these elves - to see how strong-willed and stubborn either could be. I particularly enjoyed that Cloudfern was willing to share, and later, that he was willing to let Rainpace share.
Holly H.
New! Entered: 2015-03-30
What I particularly enjoyed here was that while Rainpace did learn something from Cloudfern, he also stood up to the older elf, and in a way, insisted that Cloudfern learn something too. Of course Cloudfern's experiences were traumatic, and his feelings are valid -- but that doesn't mean his is the last say on the matter. I was glad to feel, in this story, like the end result was more of an exchange of views, rather than a one-way reminder of Cloudfern's strong feelings.
Merry Calliope
New! Entered: 2015-02-09
I really love the back-and-forth in this story. Cloudfern's age and experience informing but also clouding his view of the situation and Rainpace's relative youth and /his/ experiences doing the same for him. Beautifully told and it was nice to see the local humans be shown with more personality as well.
Peggy B.
New! Entered: 2015-01-25
Sofia, once again many, many thanks for volunteering to write this story and for doing such a great job with it. I was surprised how well you anticipated Rainpace’s reactions and you also have a good feel for the local humans.
The story made me teary, too. Poor, poor Cloudfern! But although his mind is set about humans it is great to see, that he listens. And although he does not share RP’s opinion (probably never will), he understands why the younger one believes in it.
This makes me really curious about CF’s reaction when one day the elves make contact to the local humans… This is going to be interesting! ;)
Joanne P.
New! Entered: 2015-01-24
An interesting study in contrasts. Both Cloudfern and Rainpace's views are understandable, as are their reactions to the other's view of humans. As is usually the case, the truth probably lies somewhere between the two.
I do think the timing for this seems a bit odd to me. I had to go back and look at the timeline again and this would be 10 years after the humans moved into the holt area. If they have been near the thornwall before, you would think that Cloudfern would have come up against them, or at least the evidence of them, a time or two before, especially in his duties in the upkeep of the thornwall. I guess Brightwood's unwrapping would make it fresh again.
Melanie D.
New! Entered: 2015-01-24
Oh boy. This conflicht between the two fraction of elves will stay interesting. I like how you build the discussion up and how even it came out. It's clearly emotional for both sides. I also like that Rainpace tries so hard to understand Cloudfern here and wants to know what made him so fearful and mistrusting towards humans in more then just words and stories. It's brave of both to share these horrific memories.
I did like how Rainpace tried to make Cloudfern familiar with the humans and how badly it backfired (understandably) at him.
I enjoyed reading this a lot. Ingrit is right. You captured very well how one could feel after such a traumatic experience. Poor Cloudfern. I do hope he'll find a way to deal with it someday. And I'm glad Rainpace could help at least a little (also I'm glad Cloudfern tried to take in what Rainpace shared). This all makes me wonder how Cloudfern feels about Beetle being so ... human-crazy...

A special Bonus of course was the little hint at Newt XD But that's because I'm biased.
Ingrid G.
New! Entered: 2015-01-24
*SNIFF*!! My eyes got misty as I read the story. Poor Cloudfern!! You captured PTSD perfectly! I hope Cloudfern gets some semblance of healing one day. I'm glad Rainpace tried.
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