Comments on 'Shapers'
Please note: These comments are the personal opinons of members, and do not represent any sort of official judgement, even if they are made by people in club management. Everyone deserves respect for their creativity; but if you find a negative comment on one of your works, please don't take it personally. On the other hand, genuine personal attacks are not tolerated and any comment containing them will be deleted as soon as we discover it!
New! Entered: 2015-01-01
|Ever since "Second Best" I've been waiting for Thornbow's insecurities about magical shaping versus his own bow making, and you've addressed it here perfectly! I like how while everything was from Brightwood's point of view Thornbow's thoughts and feelings were made utterly clear via his body language and commets. Great to see a brewing conflict be neutralized in such a frienldy fashion :) I feel I understand the characters more having read this. Loved the way Brightwood saw traces of Tallow and Birdcatcher in Thornbow!|
New! Entered: 2014-10-10
|It's really interesting to see this interaction between two elves who are so far apart in personality. It's something I've wanted to see since I read somewhere in a list of Brightwood's potential sexual partners at the end was something like Thornbow - possible but very weird. I like that you've taken the time to think about the elves that connect the two to each other and how they color Brightwood's impressions of Thornbow. It really brings home how much has changed for Brightwood and that people who were around a long time ago in the tribe she knew are still very recent associations for her. It's logical that she would make sense of her new world by drawing connections to what she knew.|
New! Entered: 2014-10-09
|Oh yays! It's a delight to see Thornbow get some appreciation here. The man has earned it!|
On the flip side, however, my eyebrows did this disappear-into-the-hairline thing when Brightwood says she never learned to make a bow. How early did her shaping develop? Learning to make a functional bow in the wilds is basic survival bushcraft that ever elf should have learned before they've left the tribe for their first Very Long Walk as a young teen. Just like every member of the tribe should be assumed to know how to knap a basic flint blade, or waterproof a raw hide.
New! Entered: 2014-10-05
|I definitely enjoyed this insight into Brightwood's mind and way of thinking, so see some of her flaws, too. We had so few of these insights. It helps a lot to understand this character better.|
I liked her musing about former elves she had known and how she recognizes glimpses of them in the new elves around her, now. What a strange situation that must be!
New! Entered: 2014-10-02
|I really enjoyed seeing the interaction between these two, and how the differences between hand-crafting and shaping were highlighted. |
On a different note, though, I always really admire authors who can come up with creative sayings like "that old stinkbear's harder to soften than a salted scrap of travel-meat." I had a little chuckle at the imagery there ^_^
Can't wait to see more of your stories!
New! Entered: 2014-09-30
|I think this wonderfully highlights that magical shaping isn't just a *poof* instant perfection that happens, and Brightwood defends her efforts wonderfully. It's great to see her and Thornbow together, sharing their skills like this. It really entwines Brightwood into the present time, as much as she still has the ties to the past. I really enjoyed the play of their personalities against each other here. You can really evoke so much of Thornbow in his gestures and body language and expression even before the spoken words. It really works nicely against Brightwood's more outspokenness!|
New! Entered: 2014-09-17
|Oh Joan. I missed your writing so much. SO SO much! Reading this rekindled a bit of my low burning fire for RTH. |
I do love what you did here. Brightwood has so much character here and I like her bouncing off of Thornbow. All the hints at Tallow and how much alike and different she is from her son. I found this was a very nice look at Thornbow as well.
Further I got the feeling this is a nice "The grass is always greener" story type. Each shaper being a bit envious on the other for their skills. I like that Brigtwood is willing to admit her "laziness" when it came to learning the skill of crafting a bow, and yet not being told what she dose is less work then actual crafting.
I'd imagine this is something that might be in some heads indeed, that magic makes things easy. I liked that touch a lot especially emphasized through the small quarrel with Tallow in the past.
Really dug Brightwood here and.. again. I missed your stories SO much.
New! Entered: 2014-09-16
|This is a great combo, Joan! For a start, these two are such a contrast in temperment, and it's nice to see Brightwood interact with a tribemate she never knew in the past. But I also really like the way you explored what shaping is, and how it's tricky, an effort and a skill rather than something that just "magically happens". I also like seeing Brightwood interested in learning how to do things a different way.|