Comments on 'Strength in the Tunnels'
Please note: These comments are the personal opinons of members, and do not represent any sort of official judgement, even if they are made by people in club management. Everyone deserves respect for their creativity; but if you find a negative comment on one of your works, please don't take it personally. On the other hand, genuine personal attacks are not tolerated and any comment containing them will be deleted as soon as we discover it!
New! Entered: 2016-01-08
|What a morbid display! Not Redpike's wisest choice, I think - I'm with Brightmetal on this, they should have taken the side-tunnels. But what a moment for her! I can definitely see her being more fit for leadership than Redpike, even if he's her superior. And getting a look at youth!Quartz and mump!Forge was a nice addition to go with Brightmetal's character development.|
New! Entered: 2015-01-29
|You forget sometimes that the Trolls don't know the elves, they have no emotional connection to them, Brightmetal referred to Ice as 'cargo'. Well, I suppose they do have one, fear... so interesting seeing the world of Trolls.|
New! Entered: 2015-01-12
|I agree that it is good to see Brightmetal here, in her younger years. I do think, though, that it is always difficult to tell what the other trolls are really thinking... for all I can tell, Redpike was boasting of troll abilities, but quite possibly intending fear as a result. There's so much intrigue to their society.|
New! Entered: 2014-05-05
|I keep thinking I'm going to be tired of these troll stories, but you keep turning them around and make them just entertaining and intriguing. |
I flippin' love Brightmetal here. She has a LOT of charisma and it's easy to see why she outranked her former supervisor. I like the sense of empathy she shows towards the crowed and how it comes through that she's not just a brute in charge but a true guard. Protecting and reassuring those in her care.
As Holly said I like the different approaches of the two trolls here and you kinda get that maybe they had the same intention but Redpike might have underestimated the fear this image would cause.
Forge was great and I love how every troll is oozing with character even in such a short while. I get the feeling you put a lot of thought into all of this and it pays off each time.
I agree a bit with Beth through. I don't get why the crowed would mop up on a child. Some yes, but maybe not all? I see why you did it through. It's maybe more a reaction to Quarz's doom-and-gloom speech then to the child itself. Just a fear reaction maybe.
New! Entered: 2014-04-11
|I really particularly like how this story shows the contrast between approaches by two different members of Tactics & Arms. Redpike has his reasons for the public display of the dead elf's body… but you have to question whether it had his intended effect on his audience. (That is, he meant it to do one thing, but is that actually the way the audience received it? He wanted it to be reassuring, but instead, it provoked fear.) And on the other hand, Brightmetal shows herself to be more perceptive than he, good at reading a crowd and taking control of it. It really DOES show why, even if she is younger than Redpike, she eventually winds up becoming higher-ranked than he does. His judgement doesn't appear as sound as her's.|
New! Entered: 2014-04-05
|Oh, fantastic details in this piece! I love getting more glimpses into Underhaven. I really like how Brightmetal handled the fear - she's definitely showing signs of leadership here, despite Redpike's initial control. |
The fear seems to spread rather fast! Stylistically, I think it'd make more sense to have Quartz interject her fears between Forge's rapid-fire questions in writing, rather then just suggesting the mump's chattering questions continue. I don't really understand why the adults turn on Forge near the end there, that seems a bit strange - his questions aren't putting them in immediate danger of the elves appearing for vengeance. I can sort of see Quartz alone panicking about that...
Still, it's a really nice background to showcase Brightmetal's strength against, and an interesting look at the troll society and how they interact. :) And great to have a story to go with Peggy's illustration!
New! Entered: 2014-03-28
|It is great to see Brightmetal in her younger years. No wonder she became 1st on the Tactics and Arms seat. I really enjoyed to see how you developed a story around my troll picture and how you gave all those trolls a name and background. You described the fear and tension exactly how I had imagined it and how I had tried to capture it in this pic.|