Comments on 'In the Stars'

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Ingrid G.
New! Updated: 2016-02-27
I really feel for Briar/Farscout ~ he was old enough to take some responsibilities after the famine but young enough to be treated as a cub. And I felt his pang of jealousy! The father loss is very real! Interesting that he might have chosen "Mars", the red star.
Emberra Owen
New! Entered: 2014-09-02
The imagery of her tearing at the crawfish was awesome, even if I gagged a little (I don't like seafood, lol). This was an awesome read, you can really get a sense of Briar's feelings toward the loss of so much of the tribe, and it was interesting to see some of his thoughts on his father.
Sofia Lindström
New! Entered: 2012-12-21
The aftermath of the horrible winter they all had to suffer through really hit home in this story. The mention of Fawn losing all her playmates made me flinch; it underscored the loss in a way that the mere fact of the sickness had. The idea with the stars and Briar/Farscout's jealous was very interesting and a good look at his and Fawn/Brightwood's characters.
Razzle C.
New! Entered: 2012-12-17
Oh, what a lovely story! I think it was especially insightful into characterization that you took the personalities of the elves into account when describing *which* stars they chose and in how they chose them, whether you stated the how in narration or not. Like Brightwood's very bold personality in going straight for that most notable star, and the point of the wolf's nose for hers could be taken to indicate her father sees her as something of a guiding force in his life. :) I also love how Farscout used such introspective, emotionally significant logic (if that phrase there isn't an oxymoron!) in his choices. I also smiled at the term "brain butter" with the crawfish! :D
Peggy B.
New! Entered: 2012-12-13
Wonderful story with lovely details. Picking the year of the winter plague was very informative. I looked it up and was astonished how many - especially children - have died. The sadness and unrest of Fawn was very believable under those cicumstances. The little touch with Shyheart's smell was nice... a good reminder of the wolf blood. Hehe, and I liked her comment about the "wrestling under the furs"... I was wondering about how elf parents get some adult-time for a while, too.
Holly H.
New! Entered: 2012-12-07
The two things that I love about this are how young-Farscout is so matter-of-factly unable to make that leap of imagination, no matter how much he loves Lynx and wishes that he could; and how he can't help being a little jealous, although he keeps it inside. Both are such very real little details, for a child, and as characterization for Farscout (reminding you that he's Ice's son).
Megan McCarthy
New! Entered: 2012-10-31
I am still amazed that you could come up with a deep story like this in such a short amount of time. The ambience is just as impressive as some of your longer stories, from the scene description in the beginning to the little details like the mentions of Fawn nibbling away at a crawfish.
Whitney Ware
New! Entered: 2012-09-03
I wanted to try and present Farscout's relationship with his deceased father here -- and I don't feel as though I was all that successful, although I enjoyed writing this fic for its own sake. Farscout's true emotional father-bond was with Lynx -- that's who he thinks of first as father. His interest in Hawkcall was far more intellectual curiosity than an emotional yearning -- Farscout takes after his mum Ice FAR more than he did his biological dad! Creative theft (or inspiration, if you will) for this song came from Sting's song "I'm So Happy I Can't Stop Crying", from the Mercury Falling album. I always loved the image of picking stars for your distant loved ones. (Props as well to Jim Boyd's "Father and Farther" from the Smoke Signals album, which was another strong inspiration for me while I was writing this!)
Melanie D.
New! Entered: 2012-09-02
I kinda like to see the ripple effects on big events like the winters plague here. It's a nice reminder how much the tribe has gone through with the time and that some who are now elders witnessed it while being cubs.

The ineteraction between Farscout and Brightwood here is very neat. I love seeing how diffrenet they are and how they yet can give each other what they need. I found it especially touching how Brightwood managed to get under Farscout's skin here by riling something up and just a moment later easing something within him. (Also liked the touch of jealousy Farscout felt there. I think it's very real to feel like this)
The idea with the stars was indeed lovely. :)
Lyn Cavalier
New! Entered: 2012-09-02
Ooooh, this story is just precious! I like the glimpse of Briar and Fawn *before* they were Brightwood and Farscout. I like that Fawn went for the jugular, and that Briar was able to find some comfort in what they talked about.
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