Comments on 'Moonlit Tension'

Please note: These comments are the personal opinons of members, and do not represent any sort of official judgement, even if they are made by people in club management.  Everyone deserves respect for their creativity; but if you find a negative comment on one of your works, please don't take it personally.  On the other hand, genuine personal attacks are not tolerated and any comment containing them will be deleted as soon as we discover it!

Submitted ByComment
Ingrid G.
New! Entered: 2016-04-12
How can any elf NOT get along with Pathmark? If Thornbow can't even get along with Pathmark, no wonder Quick Fang snapped at him! Thornbow ~ what a crab! LOL
Sofia LindstrŲm
New! Entered: 2014-09-12
Interestsing to see Thornbow and Pathmark interact! Thornbow taking his anger out on Pathmark was a great way to see both of their personalities "in action".
Beth K.
New! Entered: 2014-01-29
Heh, it's fun to read about these two personalities colliding here. I love how Pathmark is so easy going about it all. The backdrop of the eclipse is really interesting, and I like how you used it dramatically, with the descriptions of the forest going silent, and not as if the powerful event magically brings Thornbow and Pathmark together. I wonder if Pathmark's leaf window-viewer ever worked? I'll keep hoping that they get to experience another one in the future and share a sense of wonder rather than tension and anxiety. :)
Lyn Cavalier
New! Entered: 2010-10-15
"He and Pathmark didnít always get along." I really hope that you develop this more and show us some backstories on how the tensions developed! I really like how Pathmark was curious, and how Thornbow just seemed bothered. I also appreciated Thornbow's sensitivity in realizing he had been taking things out on Pathmark...
Holly H.
New! Entered: 2010-07-05
Good to see a story from you -- hope it's one of many to come! It's really interesting to see how Thornbow is developing as a character here, in ways we might not have expected -- such as his testiness -- but it's great to get to see that, and I definitely want to see more.
Linda Aarts
New! Entered: 2010-06-08
Yay, Jamye, your first story published! I liked seeing more of Thornbow, especially in one of his grumpier moods. Poor Pathmark, who remains calm and helpful during the whole eclipse even if he is not welcome. Happy to see that Thornbow had the decency to apologize in the end :) What I liked most, I think, was that Thornbow intended to hide together with his wolf :D
Melanie D.
New! Entered: 2010-06-05
That was a nice little inside of tension between two triebmates sharing a very moving event. I like to see Thornbow and Pathmark intercating here even if they don't seem to get along :) I have to say to the end it get's a bit smoother in the writing ^^

I liked to see Thornbow so determined ^^
Kyna Hansen
New! Entered: 2010-06-05
I agree that it's nice to see some under-represented characters get some story time. Thornbow interests me a lot and I had no idea that he and Pathmark weren't particularly comfortable around each other. It was a nice little insight.
Heidi Henderson
New! Entered: 2010-06-03
It's nice to see two characters who haven't got a lot of exposure recently featured in a story. It's also neat to see a case where everything isn't always happy-go-lucky when it comes to relationships between tribemates.
Mareike Heilemann
New! Entered: 2010-06-03
Congratulations on your first story :D!

It's great to see two tribesmates who're a bit undervalued right now getting a spot in the limelight for a chance! Though unfortunately they don't seem to get along that well ...
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